There are some important lessons to be learned from the marriage of the Prophet with his eleven wives :
First: In choosing a wife, the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam prioritizes to choose his good religion including morals. Although he had consideration from the side nasab (honor) and beauty as at the time of marrying Shafiyyah bint Huyay. Similarly, the reason women receive the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam is because of his noble character that is so noble.
And the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam advise to choose a good religion as mentioned in the hadeeth of Abu Hurayrah radhiyallahu' anhu, the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said,
تُنْكَحُ الْمَرْأَةُ لأَرْبَعٍ لِمَالِهَا وَلِحَسَبِهَا وَجَمَالِهَا وَلِدِينِهَا ، فَاظْفَرْ بِذَاتِ الدِّينِ تَرِبَتْ يَدَاكَ
"The woman was married for four factors namely religion, dignity, property and beauty. Choose a good woman of religion. If not, you will undoubtedly to losses. "(Narrated by Bukhari, 5090 and Muslim, 1466)
From Jabir bin 'Abdillah radhiyallahu' anhu, he once said,
تَزَوَّجْتُ امْرَأَةً فِى عَهْدِ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ -صلى الله عليه وسلم- فَلَقِيتُ النَّبِىَّ -صلى الله عليه وسلم- فَقَالَ « يَا جَابِرُ تَزَوَّجْتَ ». قُلْتُ نَعَمْ. قَالَ « بِكْرٌ أَمْ ثَيِّبٌ ». قُلْتُ ثَيِّبٌ. قَالَ « فَهَلاَّ بِكْرًا تُلاَعِبُهَا ». قُلْتُ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ إِنَّ لِى أَخَوَاتٍ فَخَشِيتُ أَنْ تَدْخُلَ بَيْنِى وَبَيْنَهُنَّ. قَالَ « فَذَاكَ إِذًا. إِنَّ الْمَرْأَةَ تُنْكَحُ عَلَى دِينِهَا وَمَالِهَا وَجَمَالِهَا فَعَلَيْكَ بِذَاتِ الدِّينِ تَرِبَتْ يَدَاكَ »
"I once married a woman in the time of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam. Then I met the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam, he also asked, "O Jabir, are you married?" He replied, "Yeah already." "Are you married to a girl or widow?", Asked Rasul sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam . I replied, "Widow." The Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said, "Why do not you just marry a girl, can not you have fun with her?" I replied, "O Messenger of Rasulullah I have some sisters. I'm worried that if marry a virgin instead she will busy to play with my sisters. "The Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said," That means your reason. Remember, the woman was married because someone saw her religion, her treasures, and her beauty. Choose a good religion, you certainly reap a lucky. "(Muslim, No. 715)
And remember the good lady must get a good man,
الْخَبِيثَاتُ لِلْخَبِيثِينَ وَالْخَبِيثُونَ لِلْخَبِيثَاتِ وَالطَّيِّبَاتُ لِلطَّيِّبِينَ وَالطَّيِّبُونَ لِلطَّيِّبَاتِ
"The abominable ladies are for the abominable men, and the abominable men are for the abominable (also) women, and the good ladies are for good men and good men is for good women (also). "(Surat an-Nuur: 26)
As for the benefits of marriage to the shalih / shalihah is able to benefit from morals, can get blessings (goodness of the lot), can benefit from the way he is religious and safe from various ugliness. See Syarh-Sahih Muslim, 10:50.
Second: The wives of the famous Prophet strongly follow the command of Allah and Rasul.
Examples are Saudah binti Zam'ah and Zainab binti Jahsh. After the pilgrimage with the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam, he ordered his wives to dwell at home, no more hajj after that. They both also carry out the word of God,
وَقَرْنَ فِي بُيُوتِكُنَّ وَلَا تَبَرَّجْنَ تَبَرُّجَ الْجَاهِلِيَّةِ الْأُولَى
"stay at home, and do not make up and behave like those past Jahiliyah." (Surat al-Ahzab: 33)
Third: wife of the famous prophet with diligent prayer.
For example, Juwairiyyah known for diligent worship and diligent zikr. After Shubuh he has a habit of staying in his mosque, occupying himself with dhikr until the sun rises (until noon).
Fourth: The wives of the famous prophet are intelligent.
Among them, 'Aisyah radhiyallahu' anha. He is fourth from the narrated side of the hadith from the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam. Abu Hurairah narrated 5374 hadith. Ibn 'Umar narrated 2630 hadith. Anas bin Malik narrated 2286 hadith. Aisha herself narrated 2210 hadith. Aisyah has its own privileges for getting the hadith by directly quoting from the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam. This is different from the other companions who narrated each other. Most of the hadith narrated by Aisyah is about the Sunnah fi'liyah ie the teachings of the act or practice of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam directly.
The intelligence of Aisyah is known from how his dhabith in narrating hadith. The meaning of dhabith is the accuracy and the strength of memorization. To the extent that it is said by Abu Musa, "It is not our Companions of the Prophet getting confused about a hadith but we will come to Aishah and we will get knowledge from him." (Narrated by Tirmidhi, 3883. Al-Hafiz Abu Thahir says that the hadith this is hasan).
Fifth: Want to accept the husband's condition as it is or receive (qana'ah)
'Ubaid bin As-Sabbaq declares that Juwairiyyah-the wife of the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam-once said, the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam ever met him then asked, "Is there food at home?" He declared, "No Messenger of Rasulullah, we have no food other than goat bone obtained from my former slave and it is from the wealth of alms. "(Narrated by Muslim, no. 1806)
The virtue of the qana'ah nature mentioned in the hadith of 'Abdullah bin' Amr ibn Al-'Ash radhiyallahu 'anhuma, the Messenger of Allaah sallallahu' alaihi wa sallam said,
قَدْ أَفْلَحَ مَنْ أَسْلَمَ وَرُزِقَ كَفَافًا وَقَنَّعَهُ اللَّهُ بِمَا آتَاهُ
Sixth: Patience in the face of slander and accusations that are not true such as the case of Aisyah who was accused of having an affair.
Seventh: Teach itsar such Saudah gives his nightly quota to the Prophet's most beloved wife, Aisyah. Itsar is meant to precede the other from oneself in worldly affairs hoping the reward of the afterlife.
Eighth: Have the nature of piety and wara '.
The Prophet's wife like Ummi Salamah has a habit of many istighfar, this shows her piety.
Examples of character wara' on Zainab binti Jahsy. When Zainab was asked about Aisyah about the slander of an affair (haditsul ifki), Zainab replied, "O Messenger of Rasulullah! I keep my hearing and sight. By Allah, all I know is that he is good. "(Narrated by Bukhari, 2661 and Muslim, 2770)
In Madarij As-Salikin, Ibn al-Qayyim states, "The Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam has compiled the nature of wara' in one sentence that is in his word," Among the signs of the goodness of Islam is a person who leaves useless things. "
Ninth: Among the wives of the Prophet is known as Ummul Masakin like Zainab bint Khuzaimah and Zainab bint Jahsy dubbed Ma'wal Masakin because of giving charity to the poor.
Tenth: Defends his wife and positive thinking to him
From 'Aisyah radhiyallahu' anha, he said, "I said to the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam,' Enough already you say about Shafiyyah like this and that, she is short woman (while gesturing with her finger)." Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam also said,
لَقَدْ قُلْتِ كَلِمَةً لَوْ مُزِجَتْ بِمَاءِ الْبَحْرِ لَمَزَجَتْهُ
"Thou hast said a word which if it were mixed with the sea water, the words will pollute it." (Narrated by Abu Daud, no. 4875 and Tirmidhi, no. 2502. Al-Hafiz Abu Thahir says that this hadith sanity is saheeh).
No husband should find fault to his wife. From Jabir ibn Abdillah radhiyallahu 'anhu, he said,
نَهَى رَسُوْلُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم أَنْ يَطْرُقَ الرَّجُلُ أَهْلَهُ لَيْلاً يَتَخَوَّنُهُمْ أَوْ يَلْتَمِسُ عَثَرَاتِهِمْ
"The Messenger of Rasulullah (may peace be upon him) forbade a man to come to his wife at night to find out if his wife betrayed him or to seek his guilt" (Muslim, No. 715)
From Jabir radhiyallahu 'anhu also, the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam said,
إِذَا قَدِمَ أَحَدُكُمْ لَيْلاً فَلاَ يَأْتِيَنَّ أَهْلَهُ طُرُوْقًا حَتَّى تَسْتَحِدَّ الْمَغِيْبَةُ وَتَمْتَشِطَ الشَّعِثَةُ
"If any of you come at night then do not go to his wife. (Tell me first) to let the woman left her husband shave off her pubic hair and comb her hair. "(Narrated by Bukhari, 5246 and Muslim, No. 715)
Each couple is certainly no perfect one so need to understand the shortcomings of one and the other, then continue to improve themselves. From Abu Hurairah radhiyallahu 'anhu, the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam said,
لاَ يَفْرَكْ مُؤْمِنٌ مُؤْمِنَةً إِنْ كَرِهَ مِنْهَا خُلُقًا رَضِىَ مِنْهَا آخَرَ
"Let not a believer hate a believer. If the man does not like a morals to the woman, then let him see the other side that he pleases. "(Narrated by Muslim, no 1469).
Hope it becomes a valuable lesson.
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